Friday, May 13, 2011

Perfectionism - My own worst enemy

My big confession for the week - I haven't done all of the challenges.  And it bugs me and my perfectionist streak.  It's not even that I've been lazy.  I have accomplished more this week than I have in months in getting the house ready for friends to come over.  It's just that there are not enough hours in the day and I don't really have eyes in the back of my head to keep an eye on Brother Blessing's adventures.  Though, I think Sister Blessing wonders if I do have eyes in the back of my head.  :)

I've been trying to keep a to do list like one of the challenges suggested.  I do better when I have a list.  It keeps my ADD in check.  However, I tend to overwhelm myself by the size of the list.  I like the suggestion of only putting six items on the list for the next day.  I really tried to keep it to six.
This is where my perfectionism really kicked in.  First of all, I often had trouble figuring out what six things needed to be on the list...and what order they should be in...What if I forgot something important?  Did it matter if I didn't do them in order?  You know...silly things like that.  And there were days I didn't finish my list.  Shocking, I know!  
I felt like I was failing at the challenge when I didn't finish all the tasks from the book or on my list.  And then I tried to remind myself that a lot of times I didn't finish because I either had other things that had to get done or I had been overly ambitious with my list.  Life happens and that's okay.  The whole purpose of this challenge is not to have a perfect house, but to help me deal with my attitudes about having a clean house.  And I've been reminded how much my perfectionism gets in the way.  I can't control everything that happens especially with two little ones running around the house.  But God is in control and even when I can't see exactly what He is doing, I have to trust in Him and rest in His peace.

2 comments:

  1. Don't be hard on yourself, just do what you can. No one expects you to be perfect, so go easy on you too! Sounds like you're doing just fine trying to keep up with the kids!

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  2. I like to remind myself, all the time, that my days at home with my children are God's training ground for me too. He is in control, and shaping me to be just who He wants me to be through everyday life, conforming me to the image of Christ. Thanks for your post.

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